Ryan Adams @ Town Hall, Night 3: Crazy Town

What the heck was in the air tonight? It was just totally full of crazy. First off, the crazy dancing lady who was dancing in the aisle during the Ryan Adams Town Hall show I saw in 2004 (with a Music Slut) ended up sitting next to us. Then the guy across the aisle was lighting up his joint the entire show. He would specifically wait for the moments when there were no lights on to flick on his lighter and smoke up. WTF?

Then there were like 3 people on the left side of the stage taking pictures with that really annoying green pre-light before the flash went off–for like the ENTIRE show. GRRRRRRR!

Later crazy dancing woman tried to get the roadies to give her a set list. The head roadie told her they couldn’t give it to her. Then she shouted at another roadie and he was going to give it to her, and the head roadie knocked it out of his hand and told him not to give it to her. Then crazy lady started getting into a fight with one of the security guards–he told her to leave, then she started cursing at him, he started pushing her out of the venue.

Meanwhile some other dude grabbed the fallen set list from the stage and another security guard came over and took the piece of paper from his hand and started yelling at him too, telling him to leave. What a bunch of crazy!

Ryan Adams seemed to be out of it-
-not in a jolly drunk way (he’s 7 months sober), but in a cranky sort of way–he called the guy who shouted out “Freebird” an “asshole” and said that karma comes to get you and “asshole attract assholes”. Then only after an hour and half (with a 10-15 minute break in the middle of the set) he did not come out and do an encore even though the audience was steadily clapping. Now I know for most artists, an hour and a half set would be very long–but for Ryan Adams, that’s like a warm up session.

On the bright side, he did play “the hits” like “Come Pick Me Up”, “When the Stars Go Blue”, and “Oh My Sweet Carolina”–in the first three songs.

During the first set he had his hair in three pigtails, wore a dark blazer with a ripped sleeve, jeans with big cream-colored platform shoes underneath. During the second set, he wore a black KISS tshirt with leather jacket, his jeans, and those black shiny vinyl KISS-esque boots.

Wonder what got a bee in his bonnet… and why was Jessica Joffe not wearing any shoes, just standing in her stocking feet??? Oh and ex-Ry-Ry fiance, Leona Naess opened up. She was wearing a weird small floral print tunic + black leggings…thing.

Crazy.

SETLIST from ToBeYoung.org:

Come pick me up
When the stars go blue
Oh my sweet carolina
Love is hell
This is it
Afraid not scared
La Cienga Just Smiled

Hallelujah
Wish You Were Here
Judy Garland
Blue Sky Blues
Games
Winding Wheel
Willow Jane
29
Rescue Blues

Ryan Adams Has His Site Updated By Witches, Raps with Drunk Santa, and Releases 12 Drunk Country Songs

Oh. My. God. Ryan Adams is a retarded genius. Have you heard all the crazy raps/ country songs that have been on his official website since yesterday morning?

ryan adams
There are 12 30-50-second clips with country songs, and there are 2 full-length raps–currently being referred to as “Drunk Santa” and “The Dot Com Rap” on the RyanAdams.org message boards.

For all of you who have wondered “Kevin Costner dot com, wtf?”, here are some choice excerpts (transcribed to the best of my ability–if you know better, please correct):

“The Dot Com Rap”

Updated by witches/ This website’s updated by witches, witches, witches, and me/ Weird witches roll across and leap with their hair on fire and their nails long and they’re screaming at animals and people are going crazy and they need to take a break from recording/ Aw sh-t it’s a long record. [MORE LYRICS]

“Drunk Santa”

Yo check it/ Drunk Santa got a sardine on his face/ He’s a lonely little dog just floating through space/ Ballin’ some change tryin’ make it in the world/ The rat crew’s coming tryin’ steal it from you, huh?/ Oh Drunk Santa, oh/ (Don’t do it Drunken Santa)/ Oh Drunk Santa, oh/ (Santa don’t do it, don’t do it Drunken Santa)

“Dear Burger King”

Dear Burger King, I’ve been drinking too much this week/ ???? /Yeah ’cause I’m feeling good to go out and drink a whole f-cking lot tonight/ Get Mary Ann

“I’m Drunk as Hell, Again”

I’m drunk as hell, again/ Drunk as hell, again/ {moaning} …call me back later…

“Dear Officer David Livingston”

Dear, Dear Officer David Livingston/ You’re a good man/ Forest ranger/ Working hard to provide for your family you used to be a policeman/ Not to compromise the forest/ When I was drunk/ Aw f-ck/ I set the forest on fire/ David Livingston forest ranger of the year/ I’m sorry as f-ck/ I didn’t mean
it

We’re a Wreck

We’re a wreck/ We’re a wreck away from getting wrecked/ But now you’re dead

Wanna listen for yourself? Hit the downloads:

DOWNLOAD: 1-6 Ryan-Adams.com Country Songs

DOWNLOAD: 7-12 Ryan-Adams.com Country Songs

DOWNLOAD: “Drunk Santa” by Ryan Adams

DOWNLOAD: “Dot Com Rap” by Ryan Adams

Oooh Baby I Love Your Way…

Ryan Adams, you are a crazy crazy man. A crazy crazy man who seems to be sober now (only drinking Diet Coke, no Jack) with one left hand covered in chipped black nailpolish (hollllaaa Carson Daly!) and decked out in perfectly-fitting Batman tshirt, jeans, and cowboy boots, looking as HOT as ever!

Ryan Adams is the perfect rock star boyfriend–ok, minus the totally bonkers factor. Talented, witty, and impossibly good-looking. I actually got into a fight with Jen Music Slut at the Flashy Python show about Ryan Adams’s level of attractiveness. I voted for the “undeniably attractive” she voted for “not so much.” Needless to say, I think Jen is crazy.

The setlist according to Matt (sorry guys, it was 2am and I was in no way shape or form to be writing down set lists):

Love Is Hell/ This Is It/ Please, Do Not Let Me Go/ Cherry Lane/ Note to Self Don’t Die/ Peaceful Valley/ Wish You Were Here/ Magnolia Mountain/ Easy Plateau/ Hard Way to Fall/ Let It Ride/ To Be Young/ Dear Chicago/ Cold Roses/ Shakedown on 9th Street/ Beautiful Sorta. ENCORE: Call Me on Your Way Back Home/ Come Pick Me Up/ Mockingbird

As you can tell by the set list, it was an amazing night. There wasn’t as much looney banter as there was during that infamous 4th of July concert at Battery City Park a few years ago, but there was some excellent talk about ninjas, unicorns, and DVDs. In attendance was JP Bowerstock, Nellie McKay, and Adams main squeeze du jour, Jessica Joffe.

ryan adams bowery

ryan adams bowery

Ryan Adams’s Crazy Night of Concerts

So could it be that Ryan Adams (and his band?) are performing as “Cold Roses, Inc.” at 12:30 directly after Keane’s sold-out Bowery Ballroom show? Perhaps…The only way to find out is to buy tickets (20 bucks a pop) and show up.

Ryan Adams is scheduled to appear at the Arthur Lee Benefit earlier that night at the Beacon.

I just think it will be funny to see the Keane VIPs get kicked out of the venue to make way for the next show.

In the meantime, check out Dan’s write-up of his 20 minute convo with Captain Applebottom.

The Adams Forcast: Ryan Is Looking Hot This Week

I’m waiting for Amrit to upload his photos from the Jesse Malin Mercury Lounge show so I can drool all over myself. Not because Jesse Malin is anything to get the vapors over, but because his man pal Ryan Adams came onstage to sing two songs with him–and according to all reports Ryan was rocking the drop-dead gorgeous look. Because we all know that Ryan Adams either looks really hot or like a horrible grizzly man or backwater hillbilly. Glad to hear he’s out and about looking like the hottie he truly is.

In other Adams news, the Big Star tribute album “Big Star Small World” featuring Whiskeytown will finally be released this Tuesday, May 23rd. It was originally slated to be released in 1998 but the original label distributing the album folded before it could get published. Luckily Koch Records bought the rights in 2006 and it’ll now be available to fans. Unfortunately for NME, it’s not Idlewild on the record–it’s the disbanded pop group the Idle Wilds. Whoops.

big star small world

UPDATE: Yesssss. Amrit posted the photos. DROOOOOOLLLLL. Check out the photos he posted on Stereogum as well.

ryan adams mercury lounge

You Decide: Who Wins the War of Lindsay Lohan’s Alleged Boyfriends?

Fresh off the run-away success of the Project Cuties poll, I’m asking you the good people of the Internet to decide who the cutest of Lindsay Lohan’s rumored boyfriends. So who will it be: Ryan Adams or Jared Leto? Anyone else thing Leto kinda looked a little like Adams in Requiem for a Dream?

My vote? Adams of course. Lord knows I could never really take someone who’s band is called 30 Seconds to Mars seriously.

adams vs leto

Is Ryan Adams the New Bryan Adams for Lindsay Lohan?

In the “this is too retarded to be true” category, In Touch magazine is suggesting that Lindsay Lohan has been “quietly dating” Ryan Adams for about a month. This “report” surfaces just a few weeks after La Lohan got into the “just took a shower, slipped and cut my leg on a teacup in Bryan Adams‘s London mansion” accident according to Star magazine.

Her “pal” tells In Touch: “She’s spending all her free time with him. She has been staying at his Greenwich Village (New York) apartment almost every night. She thinks musicians are sexy and she’s a fan of his music.” When asked to comment, all former Adams girlfriend Parkey Posey would say was, “He-he-hello! What a downgrade!” Minnie Driver responded, “I thought I was supposed to be the only one rumored to be dating Ryan. Whatever.” Thanks for the heads up, Seeking Irony.

UPDATE: According to unconfirmed reports, pages from Lindsay Lohan’s hand-written diary were ripped out last week and nothing about Ryan has surfaced (Jared Leto, not so lucky…but now people thing he’s got a big *youknowwhat* so what does he care?), so let’s just hope (and pray) than La Lohan is not hitting up Ryan Adams. Ryan Adams shouldn’t want for Diego Garcia’s rumored leftovers.

Here’s a photo off of Graboff.com of Ryan recording at LoHo Studios in January of this year, which jives with our spy’s January 18th sighting…which I guess would fall under the alleged month of La Lohan dating. And if you look carefully at the LoHo Studios client list, you’ll notice that both Ryan Adams and Lindsay Lohan have recorded there–as have Moby, Interpol, Stellastarr* and John Mayer. So obviously Lindsay is dating all of them. I think I also heard a rumor that I’m dating Lindsay Lohan–but that one is true.

ryan recording

God, don’t you think all this investigative “journalism” into whether or not Lindsay Lohan is dating Ryan would be much better spent on trying to figure out what the songs he was recording sounded like?!?

Also according to the MB on RyanAdams.org, tickets for the VH1 Classics presents Sheryl Crow and Friends (I know) show in Atlantic City that Ryan is performing at go on sale this weekend on Ticketbastard. Don’t worry, I’ll hold your hair back as you vomit while purchasing tickets.

sheryl crow VH1

And just for old times sake, here’s a drawing of Ryan I made like 4 or 5 years ago: