Is Ryan Adams the New Bryan Adams for Lindsay Lohan?

In the “this is too retarded to be true” category, In Touch magazine is suggesting that Lindsay Lohan has been “quietly dating” Ryan Adams for about a month. This “report” surfaces just a few weeks after La Lohan got into the “just took a shower, slipped and cut my leg on a teacup in Bryan Adams‘s London mansion” accident according to Star magazine.

Her “pal” tells In Touch: “She’s spending all her free time with him. She has been staying at his Greenwich Village (New York) apartment almost every night. She thinks musicians are sexy and she’s a fan of his music.” When asked to comment, all former Adams girlfriend Parkey Posey would say was, “He-he-hello! What a downgrade!” Minnie Driver responded, “I thought I was supposed to be the only one rumored to be dating Ryan. Whatever.” Thanks for the heads up, Seeking Irony.

UPDATE: According to unconfirmed reports, pages from Lindsay Lohan’s hand-written diary were ripped out last week and nothing about Ryan has surfaced (Jared Leto, not so lucky…but now people thing he’s got a big *youknowwhat* so what does he care?), so let’s just hope (and pray) than La Lohan is not hitting up Ryan Adams. Ryan Adams shouldn’t want for Diego Garcia’s rumored leftovers.

Here’s a photo off of Graboff.com of Ryan recording at LoHo Studios in January of this year, which jives with our spy’s January 18th sighting…which I guess would fall under the alleged month of La Lohan dating. And if you look carefully at the LoHo Studios client list, you’ll notice that both Ryan Adams and Lindsay Lohan have recorded there–as have Moby, Interpol, Stellastarr* and John Mayer. So obviously Lindsay is dating all of them. I think I also heard a rumor that I’m dating Lindsay Lohan–but that one is true.

ryan recording

God, don’t you think all this investigative “journalism” into whether or not Lindsay Lohan is dating Ryan would be much better spent on trying to figure out what the songs he was recording sounded like?!?

Also according to the MB on RyanAdams.org, tickets for the VH1 Classics presents Sheryl Crow and Friends (I know) show in Atlantic City that Ryan is performing at go on sale this weekend on Ticketbastard. Don’t worry, I’ll hold your hair back as you vomit while purchasing tickets.

sheryl crow VH1

And just for old times sake, here’s a drawing of Ryan I made like 4 or 5 years ago:

This Past Week In a Few Paragraphs

The week that was started off last Thursday at Le Prom de Ultragrrrl thrown by SPIN (see right). Stepping inside Rothko, we instantly felt like we stepped into indie prom heaven. Boys in penquin suits and ladies in fancy dress. The Killers provided live music, all the while decked out in formal attire. It was awesome.

Mine, all mine

Let us note that Rothko has like no ventilation system whatsoever. Because of that, everyone ran outside as soon as The Killers played their last note. 45 minutes after we stepped outside we were thrown on top of a car and molested, had our ass grabbed, and had our ass kicked. This is what happens when you let friends drink vodka.

Friday it rained like a motherfucker. Just complete downpour which thrwarted plans to go see Farenheit 9/11. Instead watched Unhook the Stars and One Night In Paris. One Night In Paris was absolutely wretched. The dude, what’s his name? Rick Soloman? He does commentary before each of the four segments on the DVD. He’s all like, “Oh in this one Paris is real shy because it was our first time filming”, blabhalbhalbah. What an asshole! Paris darling, why you keep pickin’ up trash? (See Nick Carter.)

Saturday while eating brunch we gawked over the prettiest boy in a New York band then tried to see Farenheit 9/11 again. Unsuccessfully. We walked over 100 blocks and then we went to MisShapes for Karen’s Birthday/Open bar/Killers listening party. The moral of Saturday evening was don’t let us drink vodka, even if we look really cute doing it.

Sunday we finally saw Farenheit 9/11. Our “President” is a fucking moron. Later we watched the worst movie to come out last year, Love Actually. Who let that piece of crap get produced? Dear lord, it was awful!

Monday we saw Surefire headline Mercury Lounge, which was totally awesome. There were totally groupies up in the front. It was totally rad.

Last night we saw The Streets and Dizzee Rascal. We have no fucking clue about anything Dizzee Rascal said but it was fun. The Streets were superfly, and the last song of the encore was “Don’t Mug Yourself”. Mikey threw raw vegetables at the audience. Hooray.

More Odes to Boobs

To continue the boob-themed month… Britney Spear’s Breasts via Saranwarp.

Anyone else feel like Bowlmor after reading about the resurgence of bowling in the US?

Every time I pass the Remote Lounge I ask, “hey- isn’t that that place with the video cameras?” Then I walk away.

BTW locals- The Faint @ Bowery is sold out. If you don’t have tickets, try the N6 show. Also, let it be known that The Faint, Clinic, and …Trail of Dead are teaming up next month for the NME Awards show.

All my friend keep emailing me from London and depressing me, making me wish I was there to. YOU ARE ALL BASTARDS! (Y’all need digicams, I swear to god) But look how nice I am to you, I give you the Rules of the Tube via Vodkabird.

We love photologs… especially ones that have recent pictures of the Manneken-Pis. Too bad he’s not wearing the Elvis suit.

Why aren’t you buying me stuff?

Who’s Got The Moldy Peaches T-Shirt?

I’m going nutty. A story about Britney Spears that was on Salon only a few hours ago is no longer linked on the site. Now I can’t find the damn story. I think it was published too early- I believe it had a December 3 dateline. That story is where I got the freakin’ camel toe link!

My Features Prof asked my about my Moldy Peaches shirt today… that’s so awesome. She rocks. Then this kid Chris did too… but he’s totally on crack. He kept asking me if they were a Hip Hop band.. or if they sounded Hip Hop… or Punk… if they played CB’s… I was like, “Yeah, totally.” Weirdo.

Only one Strokes picture, but it’s better than nothing, eh?

Jack White Is a Rock ‘n’ Roll Edward Scissorhands

It’s that time of night/day where I watch video clips of The Strokes and The White Stripes on TOTP. Check out Jules blazer-wearing days and shorter hair. Why does Jack White scare the living daylights out of me with his pale pale face and his dark dyed hair? He looks like a rock ‘n’ roll Edward Scissorhands.

But this is far from being the most upsetting calamity of the evening. SOMEONE LET NICKY OF WESTLIFE SHAVE OFF ALL HIS BEAUTIFUL HAIR. He used to be adorable with his Ronan Keating-esque hair. Now he’s… just bald. I blame Becks. Or Jude Law. Or anyone else who’s gone bald.

To add insult to injury… they let Nicky TUCK HIS SHIRT IN HIS PANTS. WHERE WILL IT END?