Shins Keyboardist Martin Crandall Get Thrown In the Slammer on Charges of Domestic Violence

If you are a lover of reality television, especially of Tyra Banks‘s hit show America’s Next Top Model, you will be amazed by the rest of this post. OR if you are a lover of The Garden State OR of sensitive music written by men, you will also be riveted.

OK, so fans of ANTM Season 1 will already know a little something about Elyse Sewell. For those who don’t, Elyse was the awesome chick from the first season of ANTM who famously hated all the other b-tches in the house and was bored out of her mind talking to all the vapid airheads she was forced to live with. She was the cool chick with the short hair and was often seen wearing Shins t-shirts, since she was the girlfriend of The Shins keyboardist, Marty Crandall.

in happier, less douchebaggy times
The couple in happier, less violent times. Photo from Elyse Sewell’s Livejournal.

Since being on ANTM, Elyse has successfully been working as a model, mainly in the Asian markets (because Asians like dark-haired pale, skinny white people?) and from what I can surmise from reading her LiveJournal blog every now and then, her and Marty had an intense on-off relationship for a number of years.

And this is where it all gets crazy, earlier today Elyse posted photos of her bruised arm and a brief account of how on the drive back home from Albuquerque to Portland, boyfriend Marty got “shitfaced” and allegedly physically assaulted her at a Sacramento hotel. She claims to have escaped from the room and gone downstairs to inform the hotel staff that her boyfriend had beat her up, and then they called the police.

elyse sewell

When the po po came to the scene, Marty showed them a bite-mark on his arm (which Elyse claims was inflicted in self-defense) and told them he wanted to press charges of domestic violence against Elyse. The face arrested Elyse, who spent a night in jail before posting bail.

The 5’9″, 145-pound Marty has also been arrested for Corporal Injury to a Spouse/Cohabitant and Domestic Violence (picked up last night around 8:30pm), but he hasn’t quite figured out how to post bail–he’s still in jail, and you can follow his status of freedom on by searching under his name “Martin Lesley Crandall”. If anyone wants to spring $25,000, you can probably get really great seats to the next Shins show.

Both Elyse and Marty will be in court on 1/8 in Sacramento to have a hearing.

UPDATE: Martin Crandall is now a free man according to He was released as of 1/6/08.

UPDATE 1/8/08: Sewell has been cleared of all charges, Crandall is expected to be cleared as well tomorrow.

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Fabrizio Moretti Crowd Surfs at The Vines Show in Brisbane

Aussie reader Kylie wrote in with a special report from The Vines (yeah remember them?) show in Brisbane, Australia on Saturday April 14, 2007:

I thought you might like to know about a crazy 2002 moment I had on Saturday night. I went to see the Vines and the Red Riders play here in Brisbane (Australia) at The Tivoli. It was actually really great and the Vines played really well. Their fans were super into it – who knew. They got one of the most sincere encore chants I have witnessed in a while.

SO they come out for the encore and who comes out to help play the drums with them? Just Fab Moretti of The Strokes and HarMar Superstar!!!! It was insane and such a genuine surprise. People lost their minds (including me). Apparently Har Mar was in town supporting the Red Hot Chili peppers — but where the hell did Fab come from? Someone told me that he was supposed to be playing in some other band but it fell through, or something. But who cares! It was so exciting. They both banged on the drums and ran around for the encore songs of “Get Free” and “Fuck the World”. Fab also crowd surfed. But only very briefly. Unfortunately I didn’t take a camera so i didn’t get any pics for you. But I’m sure there will be some floating around somewhere.

Check out the Vines message board for more photos:

Fabrizio Moretti Crowd Surfs at The Vines Show in Brisbane

Fabrizio Moretti’s Downward Spiral Continues

Hanging out and smokin’ the death sticks with Kirstin “Kiki” Dunst is one thing, but hanging out, smoking, and then asking for some alcohol in a CHURCH WITH KIKI IN TOW? Oh Fab! You silly boy. A little “color” (that’s what we call it in “the biz”…and “the biz” is a term we use in “the biz”) from the Arcade Fire show at Judson Church tonight courtesy of my homeboyz over at Stereogum:

BARTENDER: What can I get you?
FAB: Do you have vodka … ?
BARTENDER:: Yeah, sure.
FAB: I’ll have a…
BARTENDER: Just kidding man! It’s a fucking church!
FAB: (Sheepishly) Oh.

Fab and Kiki. I. just. can’t. take. it.

I wonder when they first hooked up…could it have been at the Hennessy party in October?

Drew on the other hand is just as adorable as ever…but I’m not so sure she lives in a “in a tiny, crappy old prewar bachelorette apartment” like she claims in this New York Magazine article. (What is this, Duplex?)

Conspiracy Theory: Why Does Pete Doherty Only Cover Gorillaz Songs While Shooting Up?

As you may have heard by now, Pete Doherty once again checked into rehab on Jan 30th of this year. The next day, video and photos surfaced of Pete shooting up two days after he and Kate Moss received Buddhist blessing for their romance in a commitment ceremony of sorts on New Year’s day in Phuket.

Now I noticed something particularly strange while watching the footage of Doherty doing drugs. I realized that Doherty only sings along with the lines of the Gorillaz song “Clint Eastwood,” “I’m useless, but not for long/ The future is coming on”.

Now here’s the reason to get STOKED! It’s CONSPIRACY THEORY TIME! Could this part of some kind of SICK cross-brand marketing campaign? Both Pete’s band Babyshambles and Gorillaz are signed to record label Parlophone in the UK.

Is this viral life-style branding at its lowest? Trying to get the junkies to associate listening to Gorillaz with being hopped up on drugs? What’s next? “Hidden camera” footage of Pete quietly contemplating the results of his actions…with Coldplay softly plinking in the background? Well, I give them kudos for targeting a truly untapped market.

All kidding aside, I think it’s totally despicable that these girls, who seem to know full well who Pete was and what his problems were invited him over and proceeded to supply him with drugs AND videotape it. You’re supposed to HELP people in need, not prey on their weaknesses and take advantage of them for your own financial gain.

The View: Wasted Little Terrorizing Rock Stars In Training?

Check out this item about The View (the Scottish band, not Rosie O’Donnel and co…who I saw earlier this month at Mercury Lounge) from this week’s edition of Popbitch (if you don’t read Popbitch, you don’t have a clue, do you?):

The View rock the Liverpool Travelodge

Indie hopefuls The View played a gig in Liverpool in December. They stayed at the Travelodge near the Cavern Club. One band member put his duvet in the bath-tub, turned the taps on and then left. How rock and roll. Not surprisingly this flooded many of the rooms below.

The damage cost about seven grand. Good job The View’s new single is top three this week as it will help them pay for it.

Things I learned after reading this:

The Cavern Club is in Liverpool, England. The Travelodge Liverpool looks like this:

Here’s another view.

The hotel warns you of “noise from the building next door due to building work being undertaken” but not of “mischievous young musicians flooding all your belongings”. One double room costs 60 GBP (around 133 USD) per night–what an economic way to rock and roll! The rooms The View allegedly might have trashed might have looked like this blue and white gingham wonder–perhaps they were not fans of the cheery check pattern or vibrant orange walls.

Their video for their song, “Wasted Little DJs”:

Fab and Drew Call It Quits?

According to US Weekly everyone’s favorite Strokes couple, Fabrizio Morreti and Drew Barrymore, have parted ways. A source “close to Drew” claims, “Drew said they needed time off,” and that Fab is now living back at his old apartment. But according to the source, they have broken up twice before and always gotten back together. “This is exactly what happened last time they took a break.”

US Weekly
link via Product Shop NYC.

Dragging the (Assumed) Hilton Name Deeper into the Paparazzi and Courtroom Mud: Perez Hilton

Holy crap! I was in the magazine shop today and they had Fox News on their televisions. All I heard were the words “celebrity blogger” and “sued” and my ears perked up and when I looked up at the screen I saw a giant picture of Mario (aka Perez Hilton) staring back at me.

“Celebrity photo” agency, X17 is suing Perez Hilton for $7.6 million for the alleged illegal use of 51 photos on his website. X17 claims Hilton is committing copyright infringement. Perez contends that he is using images under the fair use of newsworthy images.

This is an incredibly interesting case for a number of reasons: The outcome of this case might determine a president precedent (hellooooo 3am postings) for other blogs and their use of copyrighted images, there’s the whole personal vendetta element between X17 and Perez, this story is going to BLOW up all over the internetz and tv, making both X17 and Perez Hilton even bigger presences, and whoever wins, we all are losers, because some lawyer is going to make the case that photos of Britney Spears’s vagina is somehow “newsworthy”. Get ready to get dumb, America.

Leave your comments on the issue to Perez on his blog post about the lawsuit, and same goes for X17.