Karen Elson for Woman of the Year

Seriously, I don’t know how Karen Elson does it. She puts up with Jack White‘s mad crazy genius antics, she’s an established singer and cabaret performer, she’s got that “supermodel” gig going for her, she’s going to be a mommy, and now on top of that she’s had the nerves of steel to stomach doing a collaboration with the unpredictable Cat Power.

Check out Karen and Chan‘s lovely (but slightly less orgasmic-sounding) version English-language version of the 1969 Serge Gainsbourg (featuring Jane Birkin) classic, “Je T’aime…Moi Non Plus” right here:

DOWNLOAD: “I Love You…Me Neither” by Cat Power and Karen Elson

It comes off of the Monsieur Gainsbourg Revisited cover album featuring other top-name acts like Franz Ferdinand, Placebo (DOWNLOAD: “Ballad of Melody Nelson”), and The Kills. It comes out on the 27th of Feb on French label Barclay Records.

monsieur gainsbourg

(Source: Pardon My Freedom and LKR_42 via You Know Who You Are)

Is Paris Hilton Afraid of London Pickpockets?

Everyone knows that Paris Hilton is a jetsetter, but did you know that all logging all those miles has made her a cautious traveler? The blonde heiress certainly has read her fair share of travel advice books about London that warn foreigners that the major metropolitan city is safe, but has a lot of petty thievery.

Why else would Ms. Hilton insist upon slinging her peach-colored Fendi purse across the front of her chest while walking the red carpet for the UK premiere of the Sienna Miller/ Heath Ledger movie Casanova? She obviously did not want to take any chances of someone snatching her Sidekick, or another sex tape video from her bag. It’s so refreshing to see the sensible side of Ms. Hilton. Wait, why are you giggling?

paris hilton casnova premiere

(Source via ONTD)

You Decide: Who Wins the War of Lindsay Lohan’s Alleged Boyfriends?

Fresh off the run-away success of the Project Cuties poll, I’m asking you the good people of the Internet to decide who the cutest of Lindsay Lohan’s rumored boyfriends. So who will it be: Ryan Adams or Jared Leto? Anyone else thing Leto kinda looked a little like Adams in Requiem for a Dream?

My vote? Adams of course. Lord knows I could never really take someone who’s band is called 30 Seconds to Mars seriously.

adams vs leto

Is Ryan Adams the New Bryan Adams for Lindsay Lohan?

In the “this is too retarded to be true” category, In Touch magazine is suggesting that Lindsay Lohan has been “quietly dating” Ryan Adams for about a month. This “report” surfaces just a few weeks after La Lohan got into the “just took a shower, slipped and cut my leg on a teacup in Bryan Adams‘s London mansion” accident according to Star magazine.

Her “pal” tells In Touch: “She’s spending all her free time with him. She has been staying at his Greenwich Village (New York) apartment almost every night. She thinks musicians are sexy and she’s a fan of his music.” When asked to comment, all former Adams girlfriend Parkey Posey would say was, “He-he-hello! What a downgrade!” Minnie Driver responded, “I thought I was supposed to be the only one rumored to be dating Ryan. Whatever.” Thanks for the heads up, Seeking Irony.

UPDATE: According to unconfirmed reports, pages from Lindsay Lohan’s hand-written diary were ripped out last week and nothing about Ryan has surfaced (Jared Leto, not so lucky…but now people thing he’s got a big *youknowwhat* so what does he care?), so let’s just hope (and pray) than La Lohan is not hitting up Ryan Adams. Ryan Adams shouldn’t want for Diego Garcia’s rumored leftovers.

Here’s a photo off of Graboff.com of Ryan recording at LoHo Studios in January of this year, which jives with our spy’s January 18th sighting…which I guess would fall under the alleged month of La Lohan dating. And if you look carefully at the LoHo Studios client list, you’ll notice that both Ryan Adams and Lindsay Lohan have recorded there–as have Moby, Interpol, Stellastarr* and John Mayer. So obviously Lindsay is dating all of them. I think I also heard a rumor that I’m dating Lindsay Lohan–but that one is true.

ryan recording

God, don’t you think all this investigative “journalism” into whether or not Lindsay Lohan is dating Ryan would be much better spent on trying to figure out what the songs he was recording sounded like?!?

Also according to the MB on RyanAdams.org, tickets for the VH1 Classics presents Sheryl Crow and Friends (I know) show in Atlantic City that Ryan is performing at go on sale this weekend on Ticketbastard. Don’t worry, I’ll hold your hair back as you vomit while purchasing tickets.

sheryl crow VH1

And just for old times sake, here’s a drawing of Ryan I made like 4 or 5 years ago:

Vanity Fair Goes Bottoms Up

Is this Vanity Fair cover really necessary? Tom Ford, Kiera Knightley, and Scarlett Johansson look like weird, blue-toned mutants in this photo. They all look like they’ve been Photoshopped within an inch of their lives. Kiera and Scarlett look particularly pasty, and Scarlett’s body looks kinda pear-shaped. And why the hell does Tom Ford get to be guest art director of Vanity Fair? And why the hell does he get to be on the cover? Oh yeah, I’m sure it was because Rachel McAdams backed out…

McAdams must be patting herself on the back for storming out of that photo shoot when she found out Tom Ford’s pervy “vision” was to have everyone pose completely nude. As a woman of 29, she knew better than to bare it all with two questionably talented starlets. She was even so pissed off that she canned her publicist. Do not mess with McAdams–she will f-ck your sh-t UP!

In other gross story from this VF issue, it was reported that Ford insisted that the VF fashion department pull “really grown-up clothes” (aka: skin-baring dresses and platform high heels) for child star Dakota Fanning, currently 12 years old.

Looks like Tom Ford belongs in the offensive misogynistic gay guy club with Issac Mizrahi. I can’t believe Scarlett fell for both their tricks!

tom ford VF

Oprah Wants to Know if You’re Gay (or Straight) for Heath and Jake

Woah! When did Heath Ledger get a Lindsay Lohan-scale freckle face? Oh and BTW, rumor has it that Heath will be on the cover of Rolling Stone very shortly. Let’s hope he shaves before the photoshoot.

heath ledger gq

heath ledger

BTW, are you totally gay (or totally straight) for Heath or Jake Gyllenhaal? Well Oprah is looking for you! (Hopefully this doesn’t involve any couch jumping.) Oh yeah, read it and weep:

Has Heath Ledger or Jake Gyllenhaal changed or influenced your life? How long have you been a fan? Do your friends and family think you’re obsessed with Heath or Jake? If so, tell us why!

Send your info to Oprah through this form.

Michael Pitt’s Band to Release Album in June

What would 2006 be without a record release by everyone’s favorite band fronted by Michael Pitt, Pagoda. The un-named full length will be released on Thurston Moore‘s label, Ecstatic Peace, in June of this year.

If you’re itching to see them live, head over to PAs Lounge in Somersville, MA on Monday, January 23rd @8:30pm. Pagoda will be playing with guest opener, Jamie–another Brooklyn-based band. This show will also be the first show the band will play since October of last year. Can’t make it to MA? Try their DC show at the Black Cat on Jan 26. Tickets are 7 bucks. No word just yet on any NYC shows.

Pagoda flyer MA

RELATED LINK: Photos of Pagoda I took last year.

Gossip, Golden Globes, and The Simpsons

Yes yes, thank you to everyone who wrote in telling me that the White Stripes are going to be on an upcoming episode of The Simpsons, but I thought this news was old…I could swear I heard about it ages ago…or maybe that was my psychic WS thinking. Is Karen officially pregnant yet?

Speaking of celebrity procreation, fellow musician Chris Martin and his Estee Lauder-hawking wife Gwyneth Paltrow are DEFINITELY having another baby. If you saw Gwynie on the Golden Globes you know this is true. My grandmother’s reaction to Paltrow when presenting the Cecil B. DeMille award to Sir Anthony Hopkins, “She looks fat.” It was only after I told her that she probably was pregnant that she found Gwyneth’s full face acceptable.

Gwyneth Paltrow at the Golden Globes

More on the Golden Globes, how retarded CUTE are Heath and Michelle? They are so the new Reese and Ryan, except in Heath and Michelle’s case they are both talented. Michelle was wearing the most adorable purple dress, and in every photo series of them there is at least one (if not more) photo of them looking at each other all googly-eyed. I usually do not fall for celebrity couples, but I absolutely L-O-V-E them. (What were you thinking Naomi Watts?!?)

Although it should be noted I still do kinda love Reese Witherspoon because I saw her being interviewed right after her Golden Globe win for Walk the Line by that woman Julianna from E! and she was so nice and didn’t throw up when asked lame questions.

Golden Globe couples

I didn’t watch most of the Golden Globes, but I did manage to catch Melanie Griffith looking like a train wreck. Woah! What happened there? What else was “yay”? Joaquin Phoenix, Mary Louise Parker, and Jonny Rhys Meyers winning. What was “boo”? Anne Hathaway‘s makeup and dress. Ugghh! Girl got attacked with super red lipstick and what looked like one of Sasha Cohen‘s old skating outfits. Um…and I don’t know what this is, but it’s a bit terrifying.

Has Someone Punched Jessica In the Face?

I know everyone has really been getting annoyed with Jessica Simpson of late, but who was the person who finally Lachey-ed, I mean lashed out and gave the top-heaviest Simpson sister a big ol’ shiner? This is so reminiscent of Paris Hilton‘s big ol’ bruises that she didn’t try to hide (or the ones she staged) after breaking up with Nick Carter. Obviously someone wants some sympathy for the impending divorce.

Well at least this black and blue look is better than that hideous black and red thing she wore for the People’s Choice Awards.

Jessica Simpson's shiner