UPDATE: Here’s the “Bitch is the new black” video, straight from the top. Read below to read my running commentary:
11:28PM: Yes it’s the first SNL since the writer’s strike has ended. The Backseat Blogger has decided that we should be live-blogging this event even though I’m feeling pretty lazy. So here we go…
11:29PM: Looks like the first skit is going to be a political parody of the Democratic debate.
11:32PM: Ok, so far no laughter. They are going with the angle that the moderators were all Obama supporters. Amy Poehler is Hillary, Fred Armisen is Obama. Armisen definitely has the Obama stare down.
11:38PM: Cast credits rolling…The only new “featured” cast member is Casey Wilson
11:41PM: Tina is on doing the monologue, of course commenting on the Writer’s Strike. Making the standard joke about what they were fighting over (Cue long, dry, drawn-out new clause of the contract.)
11:42PM: Steve Martin! Jumping on stage to help Tina be more of a “performer” than a “writer.” Coaching Tina to say “I can do it!” in a number of different voices, “old-time Hollywood voice,” “mousey voice,” “old Chinese woman voice.”
11:45PM: Mock commercial for the “one time a year” period pill, Annuale. Pretty funny joke about how woman will go bizerk the one time a year that you do get your period.
11:49PM: Uh oh, back with a parody of Rock of Love! This could be good. Bandanna and cowboy hat.
Heheh. Tina as a trashy blonde named Daisy with an out of control collagen lips.
Peyton expresses her concern about not getting enough face time, and how the one time she did get face time, she tried to kiss Brett and he pushed her face away and how she’s mad since he’ll make out with anything–“One time I saw him making out with a pair of sweatpants,” Peyton says.
Amy Poehler’s trademark character, Amber, the one-legged phenom is one of the ladies in the running.
Sadly, Amber is voted off, but she’s ok with that because she’s got plenty of other reality television outlets to find love on, like “Flava of Love,” and uh… “Cash Cab.”
11:56PM: An SNL Digital Short advertising a service where you can put your favorite family members in the movies. Slightly funny.
12:02AM: A game show called “What’s that Bitch Talking About?” The winner gets a 1992 Canary Yellow Mazda Protege.
12:06AM: Um… soo, like are the writers really back? B/c this episode has been decidedly unfunny. Commercial now. AAHHHH!!! It’s Jim Sturgess! It’s the preview of 21! Ohhhsnnapp! This looks awesome.
12:09AM: Carrie Underwood singing now. Errr.. she’s a little bit shaky sounding right now. Slightly flat on some of those notes.
12:11AM: Are here guitarist and violinist twins? The Backseat Blogger wants to know why Jewel is singing backup.
12:13AM: I can’t believe it takes 8 musicians and singers to make Carrie Underwood sound that completely unremarkable.
12:16AM: It’s Weekend Update with Amy and Seth Meyers
12:18AM: Mike Huckabee making a “surprise” appearance, trying to explain why he is still in the presidential race despite it being mathematically impossible to win the nomination.
12:23AM: A few funnies like the kitten who survived in the NYC Subway tunnel by hooking up with a hip-hop dance group, joke about Matthew McConaughey’s perfume called “Alright alright alright”
12:27AM: Tina Fey just served as special correspondent for Weekend Update, commenting on Women’s News. Woah, this whole episode is turning into one big Hillary lovefest. Fey’s final line, “Bitch is the new black!” Uh… should I be offended?
1:00AM: Thank god, it’s over! All in all, a little not so funny and waaaaaay to pro-Hillary. Carrie Underwood’s bionic country singer outfit scared the living daylights out of me.
Here’s to hoping the Oscars tomorrow night are better to live-blog!