Attention all lovers of the Scissor Sisters. Do any of you want to buy my scissor sisters ticket for tonight at Mercury Lounge? They are performing with the fabulous Morningwood under the pseudonym, Megapussi. I’m selling the ticket for face value–19.05 bucks. You’ll need to meet me in front of the Mercury at 7pm, as I’m DJing the Vicious show in Brooklyn tonight. The show is 21 and up.

If you are interested, e-mail me at missmodernage @ gmail.com and put “Scissor Sisters” in the subject heading. I’d much rather sell it to someone who reads the site rather than someone who read my post on Craigslist.

Thanks.

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Is anything in New York every really sold out? You could try your luck with some day-of begging at the door if you’ve got some extra time on your hands.

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Move over Hugh Grant and Charlie Sheen, there’s a newly publicized manwhore in town! Jude Law has publicly apologized for his philandering ways after it was revealed that he had cheated on fiance Sienna Miller with Daisy Wright, the nanny of his children.

Says my friend Joe, “I’m just surprised it wasn’t the manny.” Thanks to Hightower for the link.

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Woah, it’s like a whole load of weird all up in the August issue of Interview. It starts off with the fact that Pete “One Crack Pipe or Two” Doherty is on the cover of what is being heralded as the “Music Issue.” When was the last time Pete Doherty wrote a decent tune? Between his busy schedule of posing with Kate Moss, picking up trash, smoking a crack, and coming late to his court appearances, does this man have any time for a creative outlet?

But don’t stop there–it gets weirder with the Britney Spears and Kevin Federline portfolio by Michelle Kole. Briterline pose on a beach as a butler and a maid and also as their good ol’ white trash selves.

You can also catch a pre-jail sentence interview that Marc Jacobs did with Lil’ Kim. There are also some unfortunate pictures by Jill Greenberg of Ms. Kelly Osborune toward the back of the issue. Perhaps someone should have told K.O. that the left side of her face looks as though it fell asleep. Sad.

And to round out the oddness, Michael Pitt‘s old girlfriend, Alexis Dziena, appears in the movie section of the issue. She looks totally different than the tiny goth pixie look she was rocking while we were in college. She looks blonder, and healthier, and waaaay less pale. Sadly Pitt has not followed in her footsteps. Incase you weren’t aware, their former coupledom was recorded for posterity in the Joey Ramone video for “It’s A Wonderful World.”

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Watch the new Killers video for new video for “All These Things That I’ve Done,” directed by Anton Corbijn. Video summary: The band star in this mini spaghetti western as a cowboy posse who fight against “The Killer Sluts,” a group of sexy banditas. Shot in black and white. Of special interest for the ladies: In one scene Brandon takes a nice cold shower.

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Despite traffic setbacks on the BQE, and pass setbacks due to untimely arrival, I made it to (and through) this year’s Siren Festival at Coney Island.

It’s always deja vu going to this event every year. I always see the same people without fail. The same people shooting the official photos, the same guy shooting from the stage, the same writers hiding in the VIP tent, the same crew sitting on the grassy area behind Stillwell Stage, the same bloggers clicking away. I can always count on spotting certain people who I normally don’t get to see as much. I kinda love it.

But there are things I hate every year–the heat, the sunburn, the long day. This year I escaped with a mild sunburn on my right side. (Damn you setting sun!)

This year the lineup wasn’t bad. There were some great performances throughout the day. Here’s the basic rundown of my day:

12 Brett picks me and Joc in my neighborhood.

12:40 Oh shit. I think I forgot my cell phone at home. Can you try calling me? “I’m calling you now. Your phone should be ringing.” It’s not. I guess I left it at home. Oops. Remember that time I went to Siren Festival without my cell phone? Crap.

12:50 Brett on cell phone: “Doug, did you just wake up?”

12:58 Stuck in traffic on the BQE.

1:15 Escape the BQE and start taking local streets.

1:40 Arrive at Coney Island.

NINE BLACK ALPS I was sitting on the grass behind the Stillwell stage while this band played. Of course since I was behind the speakers, the sound was kinda sucky, but I heard enough to figure out that Nine Black Alps sounds like a Nirvana rip-off band.

SOMETIME AFTER 2PM Go over to where they are giving out Press/VIP bracelets. I go up and tell the lady with the list that I have a Press pass. She says, “Well the Press list closed at 1…but let me check.” She flips through her papers and then says, “The Press list is closed.” I make internal frowny faces as I see green Press bracelets sticking out of the box by her feet. As I walk away bracelet-less Joc says, “You know what she did, right? She looked at the list to see where you were from. If you had been with Rolling Stone or something she would have been like, ‘Here you go miss.’” I make more internal frowny faces.

2:20ish I’m so bummed about getting shot down by the list lady that Joc and I go get some hot dogs and hit the bathrooms. By the time we are done, we head over to see Be Your Own Pet…

BE YOUR OWN PET Ok, so I didn’t get to catch Be Your Own Pet at all. By the time I got all the eating hotdogs and bathroom business out of the way, Be Your Own Pet was over. They were supposed to go on at 2:30. We got there around 2:45 and they were already gone. What the f-ck?!?! Did they play a 15 minute set or something? If anyone actually caught them, can you tell me how they were?

3:00 Run into the Surefire boys by the near empty Stillwell stage (see above). Complain about the heat. Later we go meet up with Brett by the grassy area and then head over to see Morningwood…

MORNINGWOOD Luckily for me, the Stillwell stage area was still kinda sparse by the time Morningwood is playing. I stand off to the left by the chainlink fence and watch. Turns out I really like Morningwood quite a bit. Lead singer Chantal Claret jumped all around the stage like a hyperactive singing banshee, but in a good way. Songs are very catchy and poppy. I had no idea they were so much fun. Definitely impressed!

3:50ish Joc and I head over to the boardwalk, and walk ourselves to that same line where I was so sadly denied a Press pass in the hopes that Doug has actually arrived in the general vicinity of Coney Island so I can use his +1 VIP. Run into some folks like Scott, Jen C., Jessica, and some other folks who don’t have Web sites, so who cares about them. (I kid, I kid!) Doug finally arrives, wearing almost the same exact outfit he wore at last year’s Siren. Oh dear! But success is mine! I get slapped with the much wanted VIP bracelet, and I’m off to the races! Since it’s on the way down the ramp, I head over to catch a few songs of Q and Not U before heading over to see Diamond Nights…

DIAMOND NIGHTS

Woah! Diamond Nights totally rocked! I’ve seen them a handful of times and sometimes they’re all sorts of awesome, and sometimes some of the songs fall flat. But lucky for me, I get there just in time for all of their amazing songs (“The Girl’s Attractive,” “Saturday Fantastic,” etc.). Black “DIAMOND NIGHTS” beach balls are being tossed around the crowd. A real solid performance.

SPOON

Tired right now. More summaries/photos to come. Visit later.

MORE AT Brooklyn Vegan, Last Night’s Party, Central Village, Coolfer, Village Voice, Ice Cream Man.

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“Midwest” Discovered Between East And West Coasts

Hoooollllyyy sh-t!

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My favorite struggling musician/actor Michael Pitt lands smack dab on the cover of this week’s Village Voice. Last Days comes out at the end of the month.

In other Voice news, Tricia reports on the closing of The Cock, and the Siren Festival is this Saturday.

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