Fan Mail Gets Critical

A girl named Heidi wrote me saying I was a “retard.” Writes Heidi:

From: Heidi xxxxxxx
Sent: Wednesday, July 17, 2002 5:21 PM
To: laura
Subject: hey modernage retards

craig said “i heard the bassist of the who played this stage so it’s an honor”…not the b52s!! you guys are retarded.
see you tonight at the bowery ballroom.
love
heidi

Jesus, you get one quote fucked up and people you don’t even know are calling you a retard. I hope you don’t talk to your mom like that, because that’s not very nice, is it? I’m deaf, man… and no one ever said this shit was accurate. You try reading lips at a rock show and see how easy it is. My sign interpreter messed it up. It’s not the first time she’s pulled crap like that… there was that unfortunate incident when she mixed up “make out” with “take out” to some pretty disastrous results. Guy Berryman now has a fear of little white Chinese food boxes. That bitch is now fired. Anyway, my quote was much better, don’t you think? BECAUSE THE B-52’S ROCK HARDER THAN THE WHO!

The Vines, The Hives, and The Kinks

Every time I wear my Ikara Colt t-shirt random people ask me what “extreme close up gesture” means… like librarians and doctors. It’s weird.

3 is the number of times I heard someone call The Vines THE HIVES last night.
What the hell is wrong with you hipsters? You can’t keep the damn band names straight. There was some girl that came straight up, dead serious, to me and Ben and was like “DO YOU HAVE TICKETS TO THE HIVES?” I was like “hoooolyyy fucccckk.” I couldn’t stop laughing.

I forgot to mention The Vines were on Conan last night, didn’t I? Oops. They re-air Conan a week after the original airdate at like 3am on NBC in NY. (Craig loves Conan!) Figure it out.

I’m so psyched- I took out Hey Dude, Where’s My Car?.

Music of the moment: Highly Evolved, The Vines; BBC Sessions 1964-1997, The Kinks

PHOTO PREVIEW: The Vines @ CBGB, 7/17/02

PREVIEW: THE VINES @ CBGB’S

The Vines

The Vines

The Vines

The Vines

The Vines

Oh how I enjoyed that.

Craig Nicholls, Supreme Ruler of “Nice Ass” Kingdom.

Who was the chick who kept screaming “take off your pants!” during the entire set?

The “Ms. Jackson” cover fucking rocks the ass off everything.

*Thisclose* to a smashed guitar, but it didn’t happen.

“I heard the B-52’s played this stage, so it’s an honor.” – Craig Nicholls on playing CBGB’s

And yes, Craig is wearing a “The Vines” tshirt.

Craig craig craig craig craig.

Craig.

Oh, I lost a bobby pin at the gig. If you found it… you can keep it.

Lucky for me The Vines were good… BECAUSE I MISSED “AMERICAN IDOL”! What happened?!?!